Thursday 17 May 2012

Well I've had a sudafed, a glass of wine and no dinner! I'm a bit sqiffy. I can't face dinner, it's been such a hectic day, and I've cooked for everyone and now can't face eating it. Does that ever happen to you? School today was like an attack on the senses for some reason, everything seemed really poignant and I don't know why. I help a little boy with special needs, his memory is so bad and it made me really sad to think what will become of him in life. I try so hard to find a way of making things stick with him but some days are worse than others, and today was a particularly bad day. Then there was a whole school singing assembly in preparation for the jubilee and i could hear the kiddies singing 'the young ones, darling we're the young ones, and young ones, shouldn't be afraid, to live, love, while the flame is strong, because we may not, be the young ones, very long'. That was bringing a tear to my eye! When I got home, there was a letter from the university containing my first assignments. It took me an hour just to skim read them. It's so exciting, but very daunting. It's like they ask you questions to point you in the right direction, but you teach yourself to become a teacher. You have to find out what you need to know, with clues about what they think you might need to know.
I've been reading a new book about Dyslexia. It's about the Dore method which proposes a 'cure'. Highly contraversial. It really helped me start to understand how my son thinks. It made me feel very guilty for all the times I moan at him for being hopelessly disorganised and forgetful. I think I am trying to explain to you the elements of my day which have come together to make it more emotional than others. For me, some days are just significant in some way. Though they are ordinary, everything seems to stand out and say something to me. Today has been like that. My daughter is still singing, incessantly from her new book that arrived yesterday. It accompanies the singing lessons she has recently started at school and has trickily pitched songs in it for her to practice. It has the music with the words under and after she sang (again) this evening, she said, 'why did my brother say to me, how do you read that?' Bearing in mind that he is 10 and she is 6. It just makes my heart fill with love for my poor boy! The world he inhabits is actually so different from the one I know........................
The glass of wine has obviously just put the icing on the cake now. Although it has made my whole body relax in a way that tells me just how stressed I have obviously been this week. I hope you have all had a good week. I wonder what dilemmas and questions you all ask yourself? Please leave me a comment or send me a PM if you have something you have been thinking about. xxxxx
ps Forgot to mention the powerpoint presentation my son made for fun tonight about Predator X. They have been learning how to use powerpoint at school and he badly spelled but put together a fantastic presentation tonight and I am so so so so proud!!!!Pictures from the internet and everything in it! All done totally independently.

1 comment:

  1. Ooooh 'The Young ones' Those lyrics...they really strike a chord! More so now as a parent than they did when I was a 'young one'. It is so true, they won't be that for very long!
    So much you have said today rings true, you have had similar thoughts to me! Especially regarding our boys thought pattern and how they don't live in the same world as the rest of us! It is a very daunting revelation when it you put your mind to it at last but then you come to realise they are amazing because they are different. Their charisma alone will get them through most anything! Just when I start to think my son is finally just chugging along nicely despite his existance in an alternate universe, he comes home to confifde in his dad at bedtime (the hour when all that is bottled up comes to the surface) that he is having a horribly hard time with a particular individual at school :( Why can't people just let him continue his journey through life without knocking him down at every stage? He has no desire to engage in this ridiculous power game! However, whilst I sit here churning up about that and what you have written, our sons just seem to take it in their stride and face their next playground challenge as just another day in 'paradise' (most of the time)! Inspiring!

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