Why have I never seriously considered home cleaning wipes before? A friend recently said she uses floor wipes and I thought, it must be hard to clean the whole floor with a wipe. Then I saw them on special offer today in the Co-op and got 2 for 1. I need a few more sets of 2 for 1 and then I need to place each pack in a strategic hidden place. The plan is not to use them for 'proper' cleaning, no, that's not how you use them. You just pull one out as you pass by a wipe spot, and swipe round somewhere as you are passing. Thus prolonging the time between 'real' cleaning. It's genius. Am I a terrible housewife??
My son has spent 2 hours at Beer Quarry Caves this evening. He is in the 'pebble chorus'. There is going to be a recording tomorrow night of a song written by someone local, the children are actually scraping and bashing together pebbles to the music. Tonight was a rehearsal. We have tickets to attend tomorrow night. It's a busy day tomorrow, it's the school jubilee picnic and singing show for us parents. I am really excited. I am less excited about applying the union jack false nails on my daughter before we leave in the morning!

Crown making with year 1 and their parents was a success! We have created a suitably bejeweled crown for my daughter to wear at the celebrations on Friday. I stayed behind to help tidy up. The sticky tables and glitter filled carpet are almost back to how they were before we started. Staying on meant I was there to see 'pin the tail on the corgi'.  My daughter lost, as did everyone else except one child. She was devastated. The girl that won is perfect in my daughters eyes. She wins everything and is good at everything and is generally perfect. I think that was partly why she was so upset and cried. I wished I had left at that point. It's not nice having a bad loser for a daughter lol!
Grandma is celebrating her 88th Birthday today. I rang her briefly and the M&S flowers arrived safely first thing this morning. I hope that makes up for the fact that  the card is still on my kitchen table! Woops. I managed to get hold of my Mum who is not very cheerful. She has a bad knee, she hasn't done anything to it, it just feels uncomfortable, and like it might 'go' at any minute. She was more distressed about the neighbour that has died. It was a woman who was 2 years younger than her, she had a fit at home and died all alone. Mum was quite tearful and talking about the fragility of life. I just wish it would inspire her to get up off her arse and start living! Nothing else has so far, so I doubt this will be any different. She is registered blind, she is really tall and underweight, she is rather too fond of a glass of wine BUT she is only 58. I think she could really be classed as agoraphobic. I have tried to get her to move down to Devon, and tried to get her help but unless someone wants things to really change, it's pointless trying to cajole them. If she had managed to get herself down here this year, she could have been a great help when I start my course. She could have contact with the children, and generally feel a bit more involved, and even useful. It's not going to happen now.
It's Rainbows and Scouts tonight, and each child has a friend for tea. I have opted for pizza and curly fries. It's the safe option. I will do a bit of salad as well, but I am sure most of it will be left on the plate!
I will have to dash to pick them up now. I might get back to you all later........

My poor son is not having much luck at the moment. There was a note in his bag telling me he was beaten up today by a year 6 boy who has been punished, and that he was completely innocent. He didn't want to talk about it but a friends child concurs, he was innocent, and very upset. We went swimming at Pinewood after school, which is a holiday park nearby with a lovely pool. The outdoor pools have just opened and it was truly lovely. I hope that has helped him unwind.
I dropped off the kiddies on our return and left my husband to feed them, while I did a supermarket run. Whilst out, my Mum phoned but my husband was varnishing the picnic table so I didn't really get the full gist of the story. She apparently has a bad foot or knee, and one of her neighbours has died. I did return her call but, unsurprisingly the line was engaged, so I will have to call tomorrow to find out what's going on.
Tomorrow is parent involvement morning in my daughters class. We shall be gluing and cutting out, and making a crown for the Jubilee celebrations. I have loved listening to them both singing 'Any Old Iron' around the house; it takes me back to my own junior school days. We used to sing all the old tunes like 'Daisy Daisy' and 'My Old Man, Said Follow The Van' etc etc I am finding it very frustrating, my junior school memories are getting more vague as the years pass, and I loved my time at junior school so much. My school was brilliant. It was a smallish catholic school and I wasn't a catholic, but I was never made to feel like a heathen. I didn't do Holy Communion but I was quite a believer as a child. I said my prayers and wanted to make the world a better place. I wanted to be a good Samaritan, and I felt that I could make a difference. I think that was the start of a good outlook in life, and I am so grateful for that. I had one teacher, Mrs Lang, who was a real inspiration. When we entered her classroom, we entered her world. She was always magnificently dressed, she played the piano and did calligraphy and wrote beautifully. She was very strict, but she believed in teaching us that the world is a magnificent place, full of wonder and opportunity. Her education focused on the wonderful English language, which she clearly adored and felt should be mastered to be used with great skill. I think she was so right! She spoke beautifully, and with an amazing vocabulary which she didn't limit due to our age or comprehension. She used fabulous words and told us what they meant. When we practiced handwriting, we reproduced the lines from wonderful poems life Daffodils. We were being exposed to amazing things and learning about them, without even realising it! She is my role model. Her style and immersion in her work and devotion to it and passion for it are rare in teaching.
Woops, I went off on one then lol! On a more depressing note, I saw the news today and it was pretty grim. That family of 6 children that died in a house fire and their parents have been arrested. That poor old lady of 93 I think she was, who was dreadfully beaten in her own home and has died today of a heart attack. Finally Bob Dylan and Barrack Obama, not sure why Bob has the freedom of somewhere in America, but he does! I was still reeling from the terrible news at the beginning of the programme to fully pay attention to Bob and Barrack...........

My white dog Milly, decided today to eat all the stamens from the lilies I threw out with the garden rubbish. She looks like she's been smoking for years with yellow stains all around her chops. What on earth would possess a dog to eat that disgusting pollen? It's bad enough when they start to wilt in the house and fall on the mantle, now its all over the garden and the dog. The other major incident for the day was the text message I received from my husband at around lunchtime, which read "Train derailed!!!!!!!!!!" It's not quite as dramatic as you might think, he is the train driver, amongst other responsibilities at a botanical gardens. It's a pootling sight seeing train, that runs on diesel. Although the summer engine is pretty big and powerful and carries around 130 passengers so I replied F***, was anyone hurt and are you OK? I got one reply which said that he thought he was OK and that one woman had been taken in an ambulance. I didn't hear anything after that for over 2 hours. I was starting to get really worried but eventually he got back to me, and told me that just one carriage had jumped out of the rails, and that a lady had bumped her head. It did make me think though, that it could have been a lot worse. I know it's only a piddly little train but still, it is quite a responsibility. Most of the passengers are either children or babies or the elderly!
The secondary school visit to Axe Valley was quite a success this morning. My son liked the place and was impressed at the facilities. They are supposed to be regarded as quite good, although I have to say my old school was better, and that was quite a few years ago now and it's been totally modernised since I was there. The headmaster was a bit 'teacherly' but nice, and informative. The layout was higgledy piggledy but a mix of old and new, with quite a lot of character and nice outside areas to eat in and sit. It felt quite small and underwhelming which is probably a good thing from a child's point of view. We stood in the doorway of a science lesson, which seemed dynamic and quite exciting. The class sizes at GCSE stage are small, around 22 pupils in each class which I liked. The learning support area was really nice, and quite extensive and the SEN coordinator is a man which is good for my son, as he responds much better to male teachers. They have a programme for dyslexics called Lexia which I will have to look up, and a really good reading programme to keep on top of reluctant readers. I looked at the website again this afternoon and browsed the options booklet for year 9 which had some alternative learning options it it. That was really interesting and included vocational courses with a day a week work experience and a day at Bicton college. I think my son could do a lot worse, but I shall reserve judgement until we view the other school in Lyme. I'm not sure my daughter would like it there. It's early days for her though. She is only 6 still thank heavens!
The dentists was OK, except I need another filling. Bum! I didn't have any fillings until I had my children. Then my whole body just started to fall apart. Eyesight, hair, teeth, skin, it's all gone to rack and ruin.
Hubby is out fishing tonight. The TV hasn't been on all day, I am enjoying the peace but I may have to shatter it with the Eastenders 10pm showing. I am quite a saddo still when it comes to Corrie and EE. I don't watch them avidly but I do like to follow whats going on. As for today's world news, I haven't a clue. There could have been a huge earthquake somewhere and I wouldn't know a thing about it!
Gorgeous day in Seaton today.

I've got that horrible Sunday feeling. I come down to earth with an extra big thud after a particularly lovely weekend. It's back to seriousness now and trying to get uniform and bags ready, cleaning children and doing reading and homework. My son was looking at his computer in his room at nearly midnight last night, which is most definitely against the rules, even if it was a Saturday. I've told him he is to be in bed by 7.30pm and asleep by 8pm all week, then awake under his own steam at 7am. He is most disgruntled to say the least. There haven't been many consequences of actions lately, and I think that this is a good punishment, because the extra sleep and more strict routine will actually do him some good. For now though, I think he's gone back to hating me!
It's another busy week for us. Thank heavens it's half term at the end of it. I still don't know what we're going to do for the hols. We should really make the most of it before my course starts. We are viewing a potential secondary school for my son tomorrow morning then I have the dentist in the afternoon. Then it's rangers club after school. I'm writing this down to try and commit the schedule to memory more than anything else!
The party in the park was nice, and we were lucky it didn't rain. We were just packing up as the beat boxing vicar was getting going. It was a lovely event and both children really enjoyed it. They did clean out my purse with a constant string of demands for 50p, but in this day and age you have to thank your lucky stars it wasn't a fiver a go! My friend just put the cherry on the top when she popped to the Coop for a couple of cans of Pimms and lemonade, and a lovely champagne and strawberry cake. She is an angel!
Unusually, my husband is out. He has popped down to the beach to join another friend of mine's husband fishing. He hasn't taken his rod, but he wanted to see what they had caught, and get some tips for catching his first bass.  I love it when he gets excited about things like fishing. His face lights up and his whole demeanor changes. It's so true that we derive happiness from 'doing' stuff. That reminds me, I still don't have a hobby. Oh yes I do, I blog ha ha ha.............

Today has just felt like one big moment. I would like to put today in a bottle, put a cork in it and keep it forever. Today's been rich. It hasn't been perfect, there have been some tears, some bust ups and a few things didn't go to plan, but I have soaked up my beautiful family along with the sunshine, all the long day through.Water fights and paddling pools, the lovely garden centre and delightful plants in pretty Colyton. Plants then planted with love and care into out heavenly little garden. An unplanned stop off at the bike shop and a fabulous new pink bike for my lovely little girl. A boys bass fishing trip, with no catches but no mind either, and a girls bike riding visit to the park and car park, ending in triumph as she rode along whispering to herself 'just be confident, just be confident' and then a beaming face as she shouted 'I'm doing it Mum, I'm doing it'!!!! All topped off with a change of frock and pub dinner with the dogs in the garden at The Kings Arms. My cup runneth over. Devon is scrumptious on lazy summer days, wild flowers bimble in the hedgerows, smiling people bob along and people play all sorts of loud music in their cars with the windows open and I love that. I even made iced tea today, and iced coffee. I wouldn't swap what I have now for all the tea in China. I even got to watch The Voice when I got home on iplayer so I am one very happy bunny. Tomorrow the forecast is for rain. Booooooooooooooooo. There is a party at the Underfleet Park for the children with a climbing wall and circus skills area and drop slide and all sorts of other cool entertainment from 2-5pm. I really hope it doesn't rain too much. My daughter can take her bike and her and my beautiful boy can ride around together. We haven't been crabbing yet this year, we must go crabbing. We all love that. I'm sure that would freak the doggies out.
How have you all spent this magical day? Leave me a comment if your day has been special in some way. I am off to my lovely clean bed now, and I am sure I shall sleep with a smile on my face. I will probably have aching cheeks in the morning lol. Night night all. Love to everyone xxxxx

Just watching Plan B on Alan Carr. He's such an arrogant twat but it's annoying because he does do good music and films. I just can't bring myself to like him. The children have just gone to bed which is ridiculous. I should be in bed already. Have you seen the Estrella Beer advert? It has an orange Mehari in it, just like the one my husband owned when we first lived in France. It brings back the memories of him crawling up hills with all his gardening equipment in the back. We must have been mad to spend our £4000 on such a vehicle but in a way I am glad we did.
We have had our grown up day today. My husbands day off while the children are at school. It hasn't been restful but it has been productive. The porch now has full lino, we collected the futon I won on ebay in Sidmouth for 99p, the lawn has been mowed and the whole house has been hoovered. We have laid on a full vegetarian bbq which is a challenge and our friends and their kids have been and left and I think they had a good time. I have eaten bits and pieces and drunk some rose and now I am again vey ready for my bed. My son seems on an even keel today and my daughter is as bonkers as ever. She gained a golden ticket from her teacher today for writing a 12 page story about  fish fairy during golden time while everyone else played. I spoke to my 87 year old Grandma this morning who is so on the ball and very interesting to talk to. She shared her views on this weeks question time and what she feels about David Cameron and austerity measures. Just imagine being 87. I think that's quite incredible. It will be 2061 if I ever reach the age of 87. OMG!

It's really hard to write anything that's going to make sense when I am so tired! I had a chat with my son tonight, during which he got extremely upset and angry, and I didn't shout at all. After telling me he hated me and that I don't love him (never said that before!) he finally told me in still quite a sketchy way, what happened with the writing on the wall incident. The poor boy is having such a hard time making decisions and working things out at the moment. I just don't know what to say to make things better for him. Should I play it down or play it up, be analytical or not give it too much importance? Go for the hard line punishment and forget it approach or the understanding, we all make mistakes approach? He contradicts himself all the time so I am either asking the wrong questions, or putting them to him in the wrong way, or more likely he just doesn't know how to explain how he feels. I love him so dearly, all I want is for him to be happy with who he is. He takes things to heart, is so black and white and sees things in such extremes.
He did say he was really sorry for saying he hated me, and that he knows I love him very much. I hope he does!

I haven't blogged yet and it's nearly midnight, on what seems like the longest day ever! It's been draining for lots of reasons but mostly due to a meeting yesterday, and then today with my sons teacher. There was an incident yesterday where he wrote on a wall at school. He wrote a 'bad' word, although he assures me he wrote luck! The talk with his teacher was more about his individual education plan but she did chat about his low moral and general lack of confidence which is all very sad.
This evening he has been on a mammoth bike ride with scouts, he wanted to take his mobile phone and I wouldn't let him so he was very upset with me. He didn't get home until 9.30 which is just too late for a 10 year old. He needed a second dinner and a bath when he got back so didn't get to bed until way too late. After all his tears at school over the last few days combined with the physical exhaustion of the bike ride, and the late night, I am sure he will be a mess tomorrow.
I have half lino tiled the porch, collected a picnic bench from Honiton and participated in year 1 PE today amongst all the other things so it has been epic. I am too tired to reflect on it all now. My bed is calling me................

For me, there is only one type of love. There are many other things like adoration, passion, respect, trust,desire and support but love stands alone and is none of these other things. Out of all the people in the world, there is only one person that I love that I chose to love. That I wasn't born to love or that wasn't born to be loved by me. That is my husband. The love I have for him is pure and deep and everlasting. It's the same as the intrinsic love that I have for my children. That is the love that I want to express freely with him. Unclouded by other emotions, relinquished from the ties of passion and respect. When this love between us flows freely, everything else falls into place. There is no particular way of expressing this love, you can't show this love in it's honest form through any particular act. It is just flowing from the soul. It can be felt by the one you love if it is allowed to flow freely between two people. I need kindness and warmth, cooperation and the strength that comes from being two, from being together and united in this world.

All my first tasks, summer reading lists and primary curriculum revision notes have all arrived with an official welcome to the PGCE course. OMG!!!! I like the first part which is a reading list of children's books. I can get my head around that. I've just returned some books to the library and picked up some books by the recommended authors. I've got The Troll by Julia Donaldson and David Roberts, Watch Out! Big Bro's Coming! by Jez Alborough. Here Comes The Poo Bus by Andy Stanton, which was my own choice. I think it'll go down well with my own children but may not be quite so suitable for the classroom setting. Kids do love poo though, and any toilet humour. I think it's their way of getting comfortable talking about the more taboo bodily functions and aspects of life. One of our family favourites is The Story of The Little Mole Who Knew It Was None of His Business. It's a book about a mole who pops his head out of his mole hole, and is promptly pooed upon. He then sets off on a mission to find out who pooed on him.
I fear the other books on my reading list will be a little less humorous and harder to digest. On the plus side, having 2 children at primary school in different year groups gives me good access to the curriculum. I can try all my sons maths homework from now on, which should ensure I can pass the maths skills test. My English is not bad, and my son's science has helped me refresh my knowledge of plant propagation and the properties of solids, liquids and gases etc.
I don't know yet where my school placements will be, and I haven't got my timetable for the days I am at the university. I have my first day's schedule which doesn't seem too challenging. I will be more worried about traffic and getting there on time and parking somewhere.
I have applied to undertake my 2 week observation at my children's school where I volunteer. I need to do that before the course officially starts. The observation is structured. I have to analyse absolutely everything and present my findings and reflections. There are loads of points I am being asked to consider, and lots of those refer to PE and ICT. These are two areas that I know very little about. I'm going to ask at school this week if I can join PE and computers for a few weeks now so that I can get an idea of what goes on.
Right, gutted we didn't go to Exeter yesterday, it looks like it was a fantastic day for all who cheered on the torch bearers. Never mind, we will have to catch up wtth it in Lyme on the 12th July. The weather today is glorious but sadly there is a heap of clothes upstairs and a pile of hangers with my name on it.

My son has been out most of the day with a friend. My daughter has been entertaining Hugo, the class bear, and reluctantly writing about her weekend activities with him . We've baked cakes and made playdoh spaghetti. I have cleaned in the kitchen drawers and rearranged them and made a powerpoint presentation to make up for the lack of photo's of Hugo. I have arranged to be refunded for a useless item bought on ebay but I haven't tidied any clothes yet. It's such a big job, it's top of the list for tomorrow. For some reason, I am watching the railway children, well it's on in the background. My daughter isn't interested in it, I think she should be, but I can't force her to look at it. The weather forecast is heartening, I think I saw 27 degrees for the end of the week. That can't be right?
I've had a deep and meaningful text conversation with my husband. That can't be right either. He's working which is usual for a Sunday, so that means communication has to be via SMS. Better to communicate like that I suppose, than not to communicate at all! It's hard to always be on the same wavelength with your partner. We generally get on really well, and we love each other dearly, but sometimes our wheels find different grooves. They run parallel rather than together, and it takes a bit of a shoggle to get them back in the same track. Relationships are much harder work than I ever imagined. Communication is always the key. Realising that people can actually see things completely differently to me is easy to forget, as well as remembering that no one is a mind reader! I also am beginning to realise that whilst people develop and grow, they don't change, not fundamentally. I don't think there are any couples out there that can say they are never out of sync with each other. Whenever I see couples that never have disputes or differences of opinion, then there is usually one person who is suppressing their views and feelings, and sacrificing themselves for the sake of their partner. What are the secrets of a long lasting and happy relationship? Of course you have to have love, but you have to have so much more too.

I'm having a relapse today and feeling pooped and ill again. The dog flap hasn't been fitted because we need to borrow an angle grinder. I have re-arranged the building site of a kitchen for the 100th time but I haven't done a lot else. The curry was yum and the kids all really enjoyed their busy days.

As you can see, the make-up artists did their stuff at Back to Broadway. She had glass shards in this fake arm injury, with a black eye, bashed head and bleeding nose, when she arrived back, she came in crying and my friend who brought her back ran in saying there had been a terrible accident. I momentarily forgot about the make-up workshop and genuinely thought there had been an accident! How gullible am I?
She brought home some extra fake flesh, and has been doing her own mock injuries all afternoon. Paintballing was also a huge success.
The hangers arrived so I shall be tackling the wardrobe situation tomorrow. We also have the task of presenting Hugo, the class teddy bears weekend antics. This is going to be extra difficult as the printer has decided to pack up. It always does that just when you need it the most. I think we will use my sons new powerpoint skills and put it together on a disc.
The olympic torch is in Exeter tomorrow. I have half thought about going, I think parking will be a nightmare. Might wait till it passes through Lyme Regis!

What a lovely relaxing day I've had. I've done some washing and a little bit of clothes tidying, although not much seeing as the ebay hangers haven't arrived yet. I've spent most of the day on the kitchen sofa, in front of the fire. It's not often that I laze around, so when I do, it feels sooooo good. My husband is 38 today. He prefers 38 to 37 because he doesn't like being an odd number. He does the school run on a Friday, and he was chuffed to have a friend remark on how slim and trim he's looking at the gates. He's been on a diet, well not really a diet, we have just been making a conscious effort to eat more healthily; to eat less carbs, we eat hardly any meat any way, and my hubby has cut out the snacks, crisps, sweets and cheesy chips from work.
We got two lamb bones from the butchers this morning for the dogs. It's amazing what it does for peace and quiet in the house. They are both guarding the bones, especially the girl Millie (we call her Mildge now, my daughter coined it), she has barely set foot out of the basket all day!
My husband has prepared a lovely curry for tomorrow night, and this evening, we have been to Lyme Regis for birthday dinner on the cobb. The cobb is the area on the sea front near the harbour, for those of you who are not familiar with Lyme. We ate in a lovely pub, really nice atmosphere and good mixture of young and old. It was quite lively with a pool table and a nice restaurant area tucked round a corner, away from the busier bar. It was called The Royal Standard. I had pan seered local scallops with salad and new potatoes for £14.95, husband had homemade cottage pie with veg at £9.95 and the children's meals were £5, one had fish, chips and peas and the other had yorkie, mash, sausage and gravy. We were disappointed. The portions were small, the fish was over cooked, the yorkie was like a bullet, the Cottage pie was flavourless with not even cheese on top, my spuds tasted re-heated, the scallops came with the coral and hadn't even been seasoned, the salad was mixed leaves and 3 halves of baby tomato so, all in all it was a bit disappointing. Nowhere near as nice as The Harbour Inn in Axmouth. We live and learn.
There is a battleship moored just outside the harbour in Lyme. My son says it's there for something to do with the Diamond Jubilee.

Yes, just looked it up, it's The HMS Edinburgh, a type 42 destroyer. There will be visits to the boat for £2 on Saturday but tickets were on a first come first served basis, and started being sold on Wednesday so I guess they will be sold out by now, seeing as there were only 180. My son would have loved that!
Anyway, there was a really nice atmosphere along the cobb in Lyme this evening, a real buzz and a feeling of Friday night in town. It's beautiful in Lyme, but somehow I am always glad to visit, and glad to come home again to Seaton.
This weekend, my daughter has the class teddy bear Hugo, for us all to entertain. It's her most favourite thing in all the world. He came for the meal with us, he now has his jamas on and has had his teeth cleaned and is in bed with her 2 other teddies Maggie and Snowy, listening to her singing those blooming songs! He had to hide his eyes when snowy got her jamas on because he's a boy and she is a girl. She is hoping that one day, they might be boyfriend and girlfriend. Ahhhhhhh........
My son is off to a paintball birthday party at 10 tomorrow. He's never done that before and is so so excited. My daughter is off to Back to Broadway again with my friend. Tomorrow they have some professional make up artists coming in to do a workshop. They will be doing prosthetic make up stuff with the children which sounds like great fun. We are SO lucky!
Husband and I will be at home trying to fit a dog flap. The instructions are just 2 pictures with no writing so it doesn't bode well. I shall let you know how we get on.
I hope you all have a great weekend. Thank you so much to all my lovely friends who keep reading my witterings, and saying such lovely things. Your comments are so nice to hear. To my friend who's son is getting stick,  I hope the situation can be sorted and that he hasn't felt too upset by it all. He is such an adorable boy, he was here this week and I loved hearing him and my 2 talking about the war wounds of their youth. He's one in a million you know, and what you said about charisma is spot on!

Well I've had a sudafed, a glass of wine and no dinner! I'm a bit sqiffy. I can't face dinner, it's been such a hectic day, and I've cooked for everyone and now can't face eating it. Does that ever happen to you? School today was like an attack on the senses for some reason, everything seemed really poignant and I don't know why. I help a little boy with special needs, his memory is so bad and it made me really sad to think what will become of him in life. I try so hard to find a way of making things stick with him but some days are worse than others, and today was a particularly bad day. Then there was a whole school singing assembly in preparation for the jubilee and i could hear the kiddies singing 'the young ones, darling we're the young ones, and young ones, shouldn't be afraid, to live, love, while the flame is strong, because we may not, be the young ones, very long'. That was bringing a tear to my eye! When I got home, there was a letter from the university containing my first assignments. It took me an hour just to skim read them. It's so exciting, but very daunting. It's like they ask you questions to point you in the right direction, but you teach yourself to become a teacher. You have to find out what you need to know, with clues about what they think you might need to know.
I've been reading a new book about Dyslexia. It's about the Dore method which proposes a 'cure'. Highly contraversial. It really helped me start to understand how my son thinks. It made me feel very guilty for all the times I moan at him for being hopelessly disorganised and forgetful. I think I am trying to explain to you the elements of my day which have come together to make it more emotional than others. For me, some days are just significant in some way. Though they are ordinary, everything seems to stand out and say something to me. Today has been like that. My daughter is still singing, incessantly from her new book that arrived yesterday. It accompanies the singing lessons she has recently started at school and has trickily pitched songs in it for her to practice. It has the music with the words under and after she sang (again) this evening, she said, 'why did my brother say to me, how do you read that?' Bearing in mind that he is 10 and she is 6. It just makes my heart fill with love for my poor boy! The world he inhabits is actually so different from the one I know........................
The glass of wine has obviously just put the icing on the cake now. Although it has made my whole body relax in a way that tells me just how stressed I have obviously been this week. I hope you have all had a good week. I wonder what dilemmas and questions you all ask yourself? Please leave me a comment or send me a PM if you have something you have been thinking about. xxxxx
ps Forgot to mention the powerpoint presentation my son made for fun tonight about Predator X. They have been learning how to use powerpoint at school and he badly spelled but put together a fantastic presentation tonight and I am so so so so proud!!!!Pictures from the internet and everything in it! All done totally independently.

I have just discovered that my friends husband is today, on the plane to Athens to collect the Olympic torch! How exciting!!! Apparently, he engineered it. His children are taking it to school tomorrow (NO surely that can't be true????) As with any big national/international event, the build up has been intense and lasted literally years. I can't believe the games don't actually start, until the end of July! There is also a big football thing happening this year, and the Queens Jubilee. What the hell will we all talk about when that's all over?
I was in my daughters class this morning, helping with reading and story writing. They are making bunting. Each child is designing and making a fabric triangle to commemorate the Jubilee. They also have planned a big tea party on the school field, and a concert of songs through the decades, including S Club 7 and JLS. I am now home, swamped in clothes. I have recently, very kindly been given 7 bin liners full of clothes. Mostly for me from a dear friend with a fantastic taste in clothes. There are also 3 sacks for the children from another friend. This now means though, that I in turn, have to have a massive clearout. Either that or I need a bigger house! Mac cheese is ready, except I have run out of cheese for on top so I will have to grab that on the way home from school.
I shall continue later........
It's 10.30pm now, where does the time go? Tonight was Rainbows for one, and Scouts for the other. A friend for tea and his lovely Mum for a cuppa. Kids are both bathed and in bed and the ironing is done. There is never a dull moment.

I tried the healing thing, but I don't think I have quite mastered it yet, either that or I just don't have the gift! I have the rottonist stinker of a cold. I have been at school all morning under the influence of Actifed, which is strong stuff. I now feel like I have been run over by a steam roller. I slept really badly and I can feel myself slipping into that really low state I was in after Christmas. I CANNOT go there again. I will do whatever it takes to get well as quickly as possible. I need chicken soup. I need lots of water and I need to rest and sleep as much as is humanly possible.
The marshes did my son a world of good last night, he relaxed and enjoyed himself looking at all the little mammals they trapped, and releasing them back onto the reserve. He especially like the shrew with it's cute pointy nose. He has more SATS today, but at least the flippin project is finished.
My daughters class have taken a different approach to spellings. We have a sound for the week, it's a_e, ai, ay, and a. This is great because her and my son can do it together. We have a worksheet with a few words on it that they have had to put into the correct spelling lists. Then these words will be put into sentences, which they will have to write out in the spellings test. I don't know how this has gone down with the other children and Mums, but I personally think it's a great idea putting the spellings into the context of a sentence.
Getting back to Karma. I have mulled over what I read and I have read a bit more about 'free will'. It got really complicated and made me feel quite idiotic. I have always had my own sense of what is ethical behaviour. I believe that awareness of the full consequences of actions is the key to making better decisions. I also feel that when my actions have been selfish, my personal consequence have been ultimately negative. Whether, over time this experience has motivated me to have more altruistic goals I am not sure. I have a sense of energy in the world. Positive and negative energy. It's a bit like the kids film Monsters Inc where initially the world they inhabit is powered by fear, and then they realise it can be powered by laughter. At least I think that's what happens.  I try to power the world by being positive, so that positive energy is what surrounds me and all the people I care about, and the rest of the world too. Does that sound really ridiculous?

My poor son today, is broken. Hours of SATS and concentration followed by a badly grazed elbow in last play time, equaled uncontrollable tears and weeping when he walked through the door. My daughter was really distressed to see her brother in such a state. I cleaned up his grazes and gave him some ibuprofen, then realised he was supposed to be at rangers club in 15 minutes! That just made him sob more when he realised that he wanted to go, but that he just didn't have the energy to even get changed, let alone get there and join in. My daughter and I gave him crisps and chocolate. I collected clothes for him to wear and we peeled his uniform off and propped him up as he pulled on the clothes. The chocolate started to kick in and he managed to pull his own coat on and we bundled him in the car and got him down to the marshes. I explained to the ranger that he was tired and emotional and she and I both agreed that the fresh air and activity would help him unwind and do him good. Poor thing!!!! At least the sun has come out for him, and they are seeing what has been caught in humane mammal traps that were set at lunch time today. He's done that before and he loved it. I've finished most of his project, I did the glossary, page numbers and contents and index today. He has to do a conclusion when he gets in though. I can't imagine he's going to be in the mood for that. It has to be handed in tomorrow. Thank goodness! Although it's no relief for my son really, as he has more SATS for the rest of the week. I am planning to stuff some chicken breasts now. I don't feel much like it, and I don't have any cocktail sticks. I hope it turns out as easy as it looks on the you tube demonstration. I am constantly amazed at how you can learn to do anything on you tube. French knitting, replacing a shed roof, stuffing a chicken breast. It's all there.

Today I was thinking about Karma. I believe in Karma, well that's what I thought. Then I tried to think about what I know about Karma and it was all my own invention, so I thought I should look it up. I got very confused by lots of conflicting information from various different religions. I would welcome some wisdom on the subject! I liked what it says under the Jainism section of Wikipedia.

• Every living being has a soul.
• Every soul is potentially divine, with innate qualities of infinite knowledge, perception, power, and bliss (masked by its karmas).
• Therefore regard every living being as you do yourself, harming no one and being kind to all living beings.
• Every soul is born as a heavenly being, human, sub-human or hellish being according to its own karma.
• Every soul is the architect of its own life, here or hereafter^.
• When a soul is freed from karmas, it becomes free and attains divine consciousness, experiencing infinite knowledge, perception, power, and bliss (Moksha).
• The triple gems of Jainism ("Right View, Right Knowledge and Right Conduct") provide the way to this realisation.There is no supreme divine creator, owner, preserver, or destroyer. The universe is self-regulated, and every soul has the potential to achieve divine consciousness (siddha) through its own efforts.
• Non-violence (to be in soul consciousness rather than body consciousness) is the foundation of right view, the condition of right knowledge and the kernel of right conduct. It leads to a state of being unattached to worldly things and being non-judgmental and non-violent; this includes compassion and forgiveness in thoughts, words and actions toward all living beings and respecting views of others (non-absolutism).
• Jainism stresses the importance of controlling the senses including the mind, as they can drag one far away from true nature of the soul.
• Limit possessions and lead a life that is useful to yourself and others. Owning an object by itself is not possessiveness; however, attachment to an object is possessiveness.^[Non-possessiveness is the balancing of needs and desires while staying detached from our possessions.
• Enjoy the company of the holy and better-qualified, be merciful to afflicted souls, and tolerate the perversely inclined.
• Four things are difficult for a soul to attain: 1. human birth, 2. knowledge of the laws governing the souls, 3. absolute conviction in the philosophy of non-violence, and 4. practicing this knowledge with conviction in everyday life activities.
• It is, therefore, important not to waste human life in evil ways. Rather, strive to rise on the ladder of spiritual evolution.
• The goal of Jainism is liberation of the soul from the negative effects of unenlightened thoughts, speech, and action. This goal is achieved through clearance of karmic obstructions by following the triple gems of Jainism.
• Namokar Mantra is the fundamental prayer in Jainism and can be recited at any time of the day. Praying by reciting this mantra, the devotee bows in respect to liberated souls still in human form (arihants), fully liberated souls forever free from rebirth (siddhas), spiritual leaders (Acharyas), teachers, and all the monks and nuns.^[29] By saluting them saying "namo namaha", Jains receive inspiration from them to follow their path to achieve true bliss and total freedom from the karmas binding their souls. In this main prayer, Jains do not ask for any favours or material benefits. This mantra serves as a simple gesture of deep respect toward beings that are more spiritually advanced. The mantra also reminds followers of the ultimate goal of reaching nirvana or moksha.
• Jains worship the icons of jinas, arihants and Tirthankaras, who have conquered their inner passions and attained divine consciousness, and study the Scriptures of these liberated beings.
• Jainism acknowledges the existence of powerful heavenly souls that look after the well-being of Tirthankaras. Usually they are found in pairs around the icons as male (yaksha) and female (yakshini) guardian deities. Even though they have supernatural powers, these deities are also souls wandering through the cycles of births and deaths just like most other souls. Over time, people began worshiping these deities as well.

Can't believe it, we all have a hint of sunburn! Saturdays are very busy in our house. Drama, tag rugby, DIY, tidying, washing, going out with the children etc etc. Today we played 'it' and hide and seek with walkie talkies in the park with some lovely friends and their children. We then discovered the pub garden at our local. I can't believe we have lived here for over a year and have never ventured into the Kings Arms before. They even gave us the key for the skittles alley. The garden is the size of a football pitch. It's fantastic.
My poor husband has to work tomorrow and feel very sad about that. He works every Sunday which is poo, especially when the weather is nice. It's great that he has Fridays off, and we get to have a grown up day together, but it's rubbish that we only get one day a week all together. I suppose we are much luckier than people who commute every day, and spend hours on smelly tubes and trains, and don't get home till really late every night. Our lives all have their positives and negatives, we just have to make the best of what we've got. And boy did we squeeze every last drop out of today! It feels like it's me that has been squeezed. I can't wait to collapse in my bed tonight.
I had a lovely email today from my best friend in France. She truly is a friend, and her message brought a tear to my eye. She said how she missed just being able to pop in for tea and talk. I really miss that too. She told me that her daughters are out playing in their little cobbled street, and sitting again on the lovely blue bench in front of their house that their Dad made (the bench not the house), and I could just picture them there, swinging their legs and laughing with Luisi, my sons best friend since he was 2! It would be so nice to be able to be transported back there for half an hour every week. I do feel quite nostalgic sometimes for our life in Prats De Mollo. I don't think we will be able to visit as I had hoped in June. Neither us nor our friends can afford it at the moment. My children need new passports and things keep breaking and leaking!
I hope you have all had a brilliant day today in the lovely sunshine. We have to make hay while the sun shines, especially here in England because it's supposed to be raining again on Monday lol!

We are watching a film called Skeletons. It's an independent British film and it's a bit weird so far but I think it looks like it could be good. It's about exorcising the skeletons from peoples cupboards. I don't know if I will get the chance to find out if it is any good coz hubby has decided it's not his cup of tea. And, talking of tea, I need one.
I'm going to say something now that, ordinarily, I probably wouldn't have told anyone. A few days a go, a friend told me that she knows she is probably bonkers, or at least that she thought I would think she was bonkers, but that she has the strange notion that she can do healing. I actually didn't think she was bonkers, but at the same time, it's not something that I know a lot about, or have a strong view on one way or another. It's actually years, since I was a student or a teenager, since I thought about 'floaty' things like ouija boards, ghosts, healing, crystals, fortune tellers, psychics and all that stuff. Anyway, last night, I felt a really sore throat coming on. I had horribly itchy ears on the inside and that heavy, stinging feeling in m sinuses. Its the lurgy my children have both just had and I could really do without being ill again. I had 5 colds and coughs from Christmas right through to March this year. I got really run down and miserable, and I am a bit apprehensive about the same thing happening again. So, I got into bed and I held my right hand just above the skin of my throat, I was drawn to the gland area, slightly to the left of my neck, and as I held my hand there it started to feel really warm. I thought healing thoughts and I thought "I can do this". As it got warm, really warm, I thought that it was really working and I felt quite euphoric. I think that's the word. I slept amazingly. I didn't wake up in the night coughing or with a dry mouth and sore throat. The first I knew of anything, it was morning. When I am ill I usually feel especially terrible when I first wake up. But, when I first woke this morning, I forgot I was ill. I had a shower and I could feel a slight tickle in the back of my throat but that was all. However, as the day has progressed I have felt very tired. Incredibly tired in fact and I do still have a cold. I am reluctant to say it obviously didn't work and is a load of rubbish, but I can't really say definitively that it has worked either. I think there could be something in it. For example, I know lots of people with allergies that suffer, only when they know they have been near a trigger. If the are unaware, then they suffer no symptoms. I have seen the symptoms that they suffer when they know they have been near a trigger, and they are very real. This I think proves that there is a such a thing as mind over matter.
Well, changing the subject again, after school today we went for a picnic to the bluebell woods at Blackberry Camp. I think we were a bit late this year, and that they were a bit past their best. They were still stunning though, and I think we found a white bluebell. Do they exist?

 

I have just had my lunch, a tiny bit of 2 day old leftover leeks and mushroom, still hungry. Tin of mackerel in teryaki sauce, strange and quite yuk (from the tin), still hungry. Lemon mousse which tasted like lemon cream cleaner, also yuk. STILL hungry so all topped off with a slice of toast and bovril. That's done the trick! It's absolutely peeing down, AGAIN, it's dark indoors and the rain is pouring off the back porch as it has no gutter, so the rain sounds even worse than it is. I am anxiously awaiting my sons return from school on his first day back, after his anxiety about going. I can feel a cold coming on, I must have caught his lurgy, and I have a strange gynecological pain rumbling on my right side. How are you all doing today, and what did you have for lunch?
I had a lovely phone conversation this morning with one of my best friends. I have known her all my life and she is 72 years old I think. She knows me inside out, and is always so interested in what I have to say. We don't get a chance to catch up that often any more, and I don't see her from one year to the next because she lives back in Essex. There is never any distance between us when we talk though. We just pick up where we left off. I follow what is going on with all her family and grandchildren, and she just makes me feel snuggly and safe and like someone really cares. I think that's how your parents are supposed to make you feel. Mine don't. I love my parents loads, and they love me tons too, but I don't think we have the kind of relationship that is conventional. I don't really feel sorry for myself on account of this; the more people I meet the more I realise that so many people have strange or weird parents, and that there are actually very few conventional families out there. Lots of people I know have lost either one, or both of their parents, so I actually feel lucky that I still have mine. I often wonder If I will become an unconventional bizarre parent when my children grow up. I wonder what they will think of me?

One day I am thinking about the joy of childhood and tooth fairies, the next I'm coaxing a seemingly depressed and distressed son to school! He said he still felt ill (I'm not convinced). He got his uniform on and dragged his heels all the way there. He scooted so went ahead, but was waiting for me inside the school grounds as I arrived with my daughter, moments later. He had tears in his eyes, and the weight of the world on his shoulders. He accompanied me in with my daughter, who skipped off to class singing, then tucked himself tight into my elbow, as we headed towards the office. I felt like I had a reception child again, you know that stage a couple of weeks after they start school, and think 'sod this' and cry and cling to you, and have to be peeled off by the teacher as you run off with tears in your own eyes, not daring to look back. I told the office he still wasn't quite up to coming back today and we both headed off back home. We chatted along the way, but I could barely hear what he was saying coz he was mumbling and whispering. He was basically saying that his class teacher is horrible. Not just to him, but to everyone. That she doesn't care about anyone and that she shouts all the time. That children fall over and have obviously hurt themselves, but that she just tells them to stop crying, and get up and get on with it. He said he is never allowed to go to the loo when he needs to, that if he coughs she sends him out of the room. I think he was exaggerating a bit, well I hope he was! Anyway, by the time we arrived back home, I too, was thoroughly miserable and despondent. I called the school and asked the SEN lady, and classroom assistant for his year group, to give me a call. I told my son that I thought I should talk about all he had said, with his teacher, I was kind of calling his bluff, but he said "yes Mum, I really think you should'. She called back, and I disappeared out of the room, but I am sure he heard parts of our conversation. I explained what had happened. I have been waiting for nearly 2 months for the report from the educational psychologist whom he saw. I told the school that I hadn't had anything back, and she informed me that they had the report at school, and that she had wanted to talk with me to arrange an appointment to discuss putting my son on the SEN register. The appointment is booked for the 22nd. I have had a bit of a look on the internet to see what being on the register means, and as far as I can tell, this is going to be a good thing. I wish I had the bloody report! I can't understand why this has all taken so long. On the phone, she talked alot about my sons inability to concentrate. I'd find it hard to concentrate though if I didn't have the foggiest idea how to write English, and found it a total struggle to read anything. It's so frustrating because he is actually very bright.
We are both here now, sitting in the lounge surrounded by paper and print outs. We are trying to finish the school project about the Axe Estuary Wetlands. I'm gonna swear twice in one blog, BLOODY project!!!!

Can't believe the time! The day has just flown by. I had my poorly son on the sofa all day so I've been giving him some TLC as well as washing about 7 loads of washing, including bedding and swimming towels. It's never ending. Anyway, My daughter has her first wobbly tooth. She is ecstatic. I don't think she could be happier or smile more if she tried. She is delighted to be able to tell everyone that she needs to avoid apples and carrots, and that it takes her twice as long now to clean her teeth because she has to be so careful of the wobbly one. The biggest excitement lies in the imminent visit of the tooth fairy. She doesn't care about the cash, just the fact that a real life fairy will be dancing across her pillow. Isn't that lovely. I guess that if I thought a real life fairy was actually going to be in my room, I'd be pretty excited too. She must think we are rather blase about the whole thing. My poor son woke the last time he lost a tooth to find that the tooth fairy must have been over-worked and running behind schedule, and that he, or she, had actually not managed to get to him. I also was horrified in the morning. In fact totally mortified! I have since written to the fairies and emphatically insisted that this NEVER happen again. My son is 10 and is already doubtful about some of the supernatural things that are part and parcel of childhood. He isn't sure though yet. I really hope Father Christmas and the tooth fairy keep coming to our house for a few more years yet. It's all a bit ridiculous when you think about it logically, but it's so magical too. What a world to live in. So many children never experience that magic, and I think that is almost more devastating, than some of the other injustices in this very unfair world.

We all know that 'stuff' is not important. That we shouldn't attach ourselves to stuff and that we certainly shouldn't be precious about it or covet other peoples stuff. I can't quite find the moral 'right' ground though when it comes to stuff. I have set up home quite a few times, and in 5 countries including setting up back in the UK on my return each time. It's not like moving house and putting all my 'stuff' in a removal van to find it all again in my new home. Each time I have moved, I have spent my time gradually re-accumulating all the things I left behind that are necessary and important. Things that make life easier and more comfortable like kettles, towels and garlic crushers. It's very frustrating knowing that I have a whole house in France full of useful 'stuff' like my dualit coffee machine, and yet here in England I have a single measure cafetiere! When I think of all the time and money I have spent buying all the bits and pieces that make a home, I shudder. The thing is, while I am in constant pursuit of everything I once had, other people are busy adding to their stuff with less basic stuff, more luxurious, better quality stuff. I am still on the basics! I am perpetually on the basics! However, how many people do you know, that have everything they think they need? How many people at any given time could say they haven't been on the look out for a new duvet, or that they were thinking of putting in a log burner or redecorating the bathroom which will mean a colour change and new towels and matching accessories etc. I might use something like a juicer or my wheelie box that I keep in the car, and a friend will say 'we need one of those'. We are all doing it, all buying stuff all the time and falling prey to advertisers and consumerism. Some stuff is just so useful though and so necessary. I'd love to know what other people think. I haven't even touched on the idea that we are judged on the stuff we own, but of course we are, all the time. Stuff is a real pain in the backside and yet we really need it!

Because my house is still a work in progress, with no carpets in most places and raw plaster and bare bricks at every turn, I don't clean it properly. I was going to say that it's hard to keep clean, but really it's fairer to say that I look at it all and say 'what's the point?' Today I finally spring cleaned our bedroom. I feel detoxified, and I'm horrified that we have been living in such a mess and a muddle. Not only have I cleaned and scrubbed, the dogs have been walked, the children have been walked and fresh aired at the park in the glorious sunshine, dinner has been cooked, eaten all together at the table, and cleared away. Four loads of washing have been done, and when my husband got home he finished fixing the leaking roof. I therefore feel totally shattered, but very satisfied. I can't wait to get into my lovely clean bed. Clean beds are on my top ten of favourite things. I wonder what you've all been up to? Bank holidays usually inspire people to get out and about.
Strangely, I can't remember childhood bank holidays. I think it's because as a child I used to 'play out' so I think an extra long weekend was usually spent the same as most weekends from the age of about 4. Some weekends were spent with my Dad, because my parents divorced when I was only 1. The rest were spent at my Nan's house playing out in her field with the other children in the street. The field had a swing, an enormous Christmas tree, several dens and a sacred corner with a tree of heaven and a hole where we believed a dead mouse had been buried. At the end of the road was 'the green'. I can only think of 5 friends that lived in the street, but there always seemed to be more people playing out than 5. There was one other girl and me that were the same age, and we were the youngest, so even though it was my Nan's field, I didn't get to say what games we played or the rules because I was the youngest. The milkman used to leave his milk crates in the den over the weekends which made perfect seats for our top secret meetings.
Kids don't play out any more do they? Certainly not as young as 4. My children don't play out because our road is too busy and because there are no other kids to play out with. When I walk around Seaton I don't see any other kids playing out in their roads. It's a real shame. Bigger kids 'hang out' at the skate park and a close friends son plays in his road, but he only has one other much younger boy to play with. I can't send my children to play in their road because it's too far from our house, and I would feel like I was leaving the responsibility for my children to my friend. I'd like to do something to change things but I'm not sure what. Not playing out is part of the reason that children spend more and more time in front of games consoles. I think it's partly responsible for the 'I'm bored' generation and the after school club junkie parents and the bank holiday and weekend search for bigger and better things to do, that all cost lots of money, and give children the impression that our role as parents is to serve and entertain. Golly, that turned into a bit of a rant. Sorry!

I should blog now because I am in the thick of preparing the meal for tonight, and I might not get a chance later. Our friends have a one year old,  so we are taking the meal to their house so he can be tucked up in bed at his usual time bless him. Got to recommend a bottle of wine we sampled last night. It was meant to go with the Italian meal but it was so good that we polished it off and I had to rush back this morning and buy another 6 bottles. It's a Blossom Hill Signature Blend and it's just called Italian Red. It's got a hint of cherry flavour and is really smooth and drinkable. It's on offer at Lidl, 3 bottles for £12. Get it while stocks last I say! I don't have sponsorship and won't get paid for saying that by the way.
Now I have to say my thank you prayers, for having met some amazing people in my life, and a second thank you prayer to facebook and other social media and the internet for allowing me to still be in touch with so many of them! Lots of my lifelong friends and acquaintances have taken the time to read my blog, for which I am touched and grateful. Moreover, they have actually applied themselves enough to give me some amazing constructive criticism and advice. To the person that said I need to stop writing like I'm writing an essay for my teacher, and write more like I talk, you are SO right. I'll really have to work hard on that, but it gives me something to work on, and a way to improve things, so that's brilliant. I'll definitely have to dust off some of my old stories too. There are some crackers that'll have me in stitches if no-one else. (have you noticed I'm trying to use more shortened things and abbreviations?)
It's already been a busy day. The roof has had some more work done on it, following some good advice last night from a builder friend (he liked the wine too by the way). My son has been to tag rugby on his bike, my daughter has been to her first 'Back To Broadway' drama session that my friend runs and she absolutely loved it. The pair of them are now at a joint birthday party, filling up on e numbers no doubt, and running around in the St Johns Ambulance hall, skidding on their knees and getting sweaty and hyper. What fun!
I have been shopping, twice. I have prepared 4 lovely banoffee desserts, puttanesca sauce and the squash and peppers and other veg are all in the oven roasting for the stuffed portobello mushrooms. Yummy. The children have just returned with red gunge around their mouths and 2 sacks full of sweets and goodies. I just said 'go on, eat it!' Once it's gone it's gone. What else can I do? If we save it, and dish it out sparingly, the saga and demands will go on for days!

I am so elated to have some comments, and they are great comments too. I shall respond with the curry recipe soon. The weekend is upon us again. I hope you all have a nice one. We are potentially entertaining again, although we are having trouble getting hold of our guests to confirm, which is playing havoc with my schedule. I don't know if they are coming tonight or tomorrow so I could potentially have to clean the entire house and cook up a three course Italian meal any second. The school phoned and my daughter is home again. Her nose is streaming and her tummy feels rumbly. Poor thing, although she seems OK to me.
There is a Fossil Festival this weekend in Lyme Regis. I have never been before, but it looks like it might be worth a go. The kids love fossils and the last time we went serious fossil hunting was at Charmouth last year. My son fell in quicksand up to his middle and my husband, who was not suitably dressed and was wearing his new best boots and jacket, had to pull him out! He lost a welly and had to walk back 1/2 mile to the car in one welly and one sock in the tailwind of my cursing husband. If my son had not been so upset I would have been hysterically laughing, not at him but at my husband. Instead I had to hold it in until later, for fear of upsetting my poor son some more, and inflaming the situation further.
I'd like to get down to the beach today if I can. There is much talk of the beach being awash with starfish which has never been seen before. The storms must have stirred things up. I'd like to see it but at the same time it is quite sad really. All those dead bodies marooned.
Husband is off today and following a trip to Homebase, we have less hazardous holes in the kitchen floor which is good; at least my chair can't fall down them again if we are entertaining over the weekend. He is now on the roof investigating the leaks that became excruciatingly apparent during the the recent rain. He has watched various you tube tutorials about how to install lead flashing, and is now up there banging away having bought a completely different repair method that will hopefully be a cinch compared to the lead. The big problem is that we have a slate roof, and you absolutely CANNOT walk on it. I am expecting to see his leg appear before me at any moment.
I think I shall start to prepare my Puttanesca sauce now, then it can be ready today or tomorrow. I could happily just light the fire instead and have forty winks. No, that would be bad considering he is on the roof slaving away!

Blog first, eat after, may be a bad strategy. All I can think about is food! Except for 'Super Gran', who remembers her? She is alive and living in Seaton. I see this little old lady nearly every day on the road to and from school, she has an upright, metal framed, push along shopping trolley. She wears a pink coat with matching pink lips and cheeks. She wears a hat that is a cross between a beret and a squashed pork pie, and she plods along with a look of mischief in her eyes. I always have to look behind me as she passes to see if she jumps in the air and clicks her heels together behind me. I am sure that woman leads a double life!
Anyway, I was at school today with year 2 again. I had a great time as usual and am heartened to find that I struggle more with how to work the photocopier, than I do with working with the children.
It's no good, I have got to go and eat............ yummy left over stinky curry which has intensified in spice and flavour. I shall stink but I don't care!
When I left school this lunch time I caught sight of the tail end of the key stage 1 Welly Club, disappearing into the school woods. How fantastic! My daughter loves this club. It is run by her previous reception class teachers so she gets to catch up with them, whilst eating her pack lunch (a once a week novelty as she normally has school dinners), sitting in a log pile circle. Then they tromp around the woods in their wellies, playing hide and seek and 'it' amongst other adventures and discoveries.
I am glad in this instance to say, that I do think she knows how lucky she is! She loves school to the point of obsession. Each morning she is a bursting with energy and filled with the delight and excited anticipation of what lies ahead. What a great way to be! She looks exhausted when she bundles out of the classroom door at the end of the day with her arms full of bags, coats, drawings and lolly sticks. She really only knows how to live in the present. At this age, her whole life is making moments, and I can't remember with my son, who is older, at what age they start to reflect more on past events, and think more wistfully about things that lie ahead.
Talking of him, yesterday his year group (5), all went down to the beach to tidy it with Meg the Ranger from the nature reserve. After Multimedia Club, he and his friend returned for tea and told me all about the condoms and syringes they found! How awful. My son said he didn't know what they were, they were warned that they might find some, so he had been looking out for those round crunchy things you sometimes eat with curry! In normal circumstances I would have explained in a matter of fact way, what they actually are, but because his friend was with us, I just did that silly mum laugh, and briskly skipped the conversation on to bikeability.
He has been taking his bike to school every day this week, and is expected to be a fully roadworthy cyclist by Friday. He has already cycled on the roads by himself, to the nature reserve classroom and back, he cycled to Scouts and back, and has managed to get to and from school each day. My heart has been leaping, and if I had any nails they would have been chewed off! He, on the other hand,  has a grin bigger than the cheshire cat's to be out on the open road and have some freedom. It makes me so happy to see him enjoying his independence so much, but it is terrifying at the same time.

Today I am thinking about making moments. My Dads partner is a cognitive behavioral therapist. She practices privately, she also writes court reports on child custody and protection cases, and her main job is working in a prison with long term offenders. What she does has always interested me, and I have talked with her before about the basic principles of CBT but I have never really looked into it any further. She once said to me that what we all need to do is enjoy the moment. To get every last bit of positivity out of each experience and not give thought to what might have happened or where else you might be at that time. This idea really resonated with me. I seem to remember having these thoughts after watching the film Big Fish, which I loved and would recommend to everyone.

The more I live, the more I understand the importance of making moments. Especially with my children. When we look at the past, we don’t remember every single thing, just certain moments. The important lessons we have learned come from moments when we participated and were active; the happiest times of our lives become moments that we cherish forever.

There is a constant stream of potential moments to be made. If you fixate on a lost moment, you miss the moments happening right in front of you.Having looked at a few articles I found this technique called 'Mindfulness'

What is Mindfulness?

Mindfulness is an ancient Buddhist practice which is very relevant for life today. Mindfulness is a very simple concept.  Mindfulness  means paying attention in a particular way:  on purpose, in the present moment, and non-judgmentally.  This increases awareness, clarity and acceptance of our present-moment reality. 

Today my daughter can't go to school due to her sore tummy. She is not really very ill, but she couldn't risk the trip to the play park so far from a loo! My day's schedule has changed completely, but I am enjoying my daughters company, and looking forward to making some order in my wardrobe later! Last night we ate the most delicious curry. My husband is on a new healthy eating plan so we had mushroom, lentil and spinach curry with wholegrain rice. I expect to some people that would sound, (and even look) disgusting. To me, the lovely green spinach leaves and the silky sauce look just heavenly and taste even better!

 Son and husband went to the cinema, son had the time of his life, husband decided he hates going to the cinema more than life itself. The film was poor, the 3D was annoying and unnecessary, and why would anyone want to watch a film in an uncomfortable chair, with a load of noisy annoying strangers AND you can't even press pause for tea and loo breaks! I agree really, but the kids do love it, and it is so nice to see their faces when they are having so much fun.

I have included at the bottom some of the common negative thinking that I am sure we all are guilty of at times. I know I am! I am not Baz Lurman or anything but it is always nice to share anything that might help or at least be interesting to think about.

Mind Reading - when you jump to conclusions or make assumptions (usually negative) about what others may be thinking about you and stress yourself out sometimes needlessly;

Catastrophising or Fortune Telling - where you tend to expect the worst, whether or not it is actually likely to happen;

Over-Generalising - Thinking or claiming that things always or never happen a certain way and forgotting about the exceptions;

Emotional Reasoning - Letting your emotions determine how you act without reflecting on practicalities or considering reasonable information that might be helpful to decision making;

Excessive Self Criticism - Continually putting yourself down (often more than you would others);

Making Demands - Using the language of 'should' or 'must'. The world and others do not always obey this type of command!

Only Noticing or Remembering Negative Aspects - When you forget good features or developments and continually focus on those things which don't go so well!

Lastly, I have ironed out the issue of not being able to leave comments! I would love to read your thoughts or comments, or hear about what interests you. You can leave a comment anonymously so go on, say something xxxx

What a beautiful day! I stood in at school today for the year 2 teaching assistant. I enjoyed it so much. I delivered a 20 minute session of phonics recapping on the sound they did yesterday which was IR as in girl and stir and then went on to do a new sound EW. I felt like a bit of an impostor but at the same time they treated me just like a teacher. I could hear myself talking and I actually sounded like a teacher. I can't wait until I really am one! It's so exciting. In literacy they are working on riddles. Riddles are quite tricky really because the first clues need to be quite vague and then they need to get more specific towards the end. The children did some fun games with different fruit and worked in pairs giving each other clues as to what fruit they were. After the games they each chose a fruit to be, they then made themselves an information sheet about that fruit that they can use tomorrow to write their own riddles. Quite gutted that I won't be there tomorrow! After morning break we did numeracy/science. Using lots of pink tinted water we investigated the capacity of different receptacles using a cup and doing estimates before actually measuring.

Tomorrow I shall be with year one, weather permitting we will be going back to the play park to investigate ideas of push and pull.

I have spent the first part of the afternoon drinking a coffee in the garden of a good friend, soaking up the sunshine. Long may it last! Some days are so good. The house is a tip, it smells of dog and there are random shoes in odd places and piles of clean washing to put away. I have no idea what delight I am cooking up for dinner tonight, and I haven't rung my Mum for over a week. I won't think any harder about what else is on the 'to do' list or I might start to feel less like smiling! Phase 2 of the day is about to begin as the children finish school in the next half an hour. We must now prepare questions so that my son can interview the ranger from the nature reserve tomorrow. We will no doubt have reading and maths homework to do, then later this evening my husband is planning to take our son to the cinema in Lyme Regis to watch the new Marvel film..... oooh that was school on the phone, daughter has sore tummy and diarrhea! Must dash!!!!!!!!!